Goodbye

Hey guys. I don't know who is ever going to read this anyway as I think all the dudes from the band has totally forgotten about his blog, about me. About the band. You know, we were pretty good. We didn't do anything wrong. George Fisher isn't standing over me like a hawk, watching everything I am writing right now (by the way, that guy is a GENIOUS, I mean... Yeah, sorry, George, I'll continue writing now... Jesus.)

After the tour, the thing we had been looking forward to our whole lives, everything just fell apart. I don't know how else to explain it. We went our seperate ways ... Sometimes Santtu visits me, but it will never be the same. We don't know what to talk about. Deep inside, I think that we both want to start again. Just do it all over again. But it wont help any, because it wont be the same.

I know this must be very confusing to read, I know that I aint telling you what the problem is, or I haven't been telling you yet. You see, after we came home Jukka went through a lot. He stopped coming to band practise, we couldn't do anything without a guitarist. Then we heard, from my cousin's friend actually (I don't know if he is suffering from brain damage or something, but I'm pretty sure he told the truth) that Jukka had been in a mental hospital for a while and that he was having a depression. I went to see him but he didn't want to speak to me.

That's pretty much how the band split up. I'm not even sure I want to be in a band any longer. Some might say it's a waste of talent - but now I just want to move on. For a long time - even before the band split up. Actually I'm afraid I've been feeling this for years - I've been feeling that something is missing. I need something more in my life than an apartment, halfway empty (or full, if you'd like) beer bottles all over the floor when I don't even drink that much myself. I know that I'm acting very strange. I should be drinking, smoking, having sex with every woman I lay my eyes on. But I can't. That's not what I want to do. Actually, I don't even know what I want (and I am NOT admitting that I'm gay!). Now I just think I'll have to concentrate on using some of my other talents. I want to be a doctor. A great doctor. And I think I can do it. I am also looking for new friends. Too many of my old friends have disapointed me, left me. I am looking for a place where I will fit in, where people wont look at my hair, my clothes and think: 'He'll gonna kill us!' I want to fit into a group of people who feel like me. Or just people who wont leave me because something happens to them. Friends that will let me help them. I actually think of moving away from Finland. I feel like I'm locked up in a little room with very high walls and no windows. I lion is standing before the door, I have to get past it to escape. And when I run straight through the lion, I will feel it's energy hit me right in the guts, and I will run and run and run and don't ever look back. I will be full of energy, I will be happy, laughing as I've never done before!

I will be free and running away and being myself.

I hope this explained to you how I am at the time. And you'll probably don't read this straight after I've posted it. By that time, I think you'll find my apartment empty. I've left some guitars here for whoever who wants to take it. And, by he way, you all know where you can find the key ... And if you don't, the guitars aint for you (that includes you, Elias, you suck at playing the guitar and I suggest the whole society go togehter at keeping you away from one, thank you. Say goodbye to mom and dad from me, would you?)

I'll go now. I can't actually say it's been great to know you all, because as you can read above, I think I've had a hidden depression myself for a couple of years now. We've had some good times though and I'll remember you for that.

See you around (probably not)
(By the way, this blog is officially closed now. There wont be more to see in here, just let it rest in peace, right?)

Our biggest chance wasted...

So, we didn't get to play any concerts at Mayhem. I just don't know, I'm SO dissapointed, I don't know what to say..

But I'll better tell you why:
Jukka decided to go out parying wild the night right before the gig, and he broke three ribs. Very unfortunate, but there's probably nothing to do about it.. Well, we can't play without our guitarist.

But now he'll have a lot of time to practise, I guess.. And from what I can read on the blog, it sounds like he's making new friends (I'm laughing a little on the inside right now, but I don't really feel like writing a smiley.)

THIS IS SO FUCKING COOL!

HELZ YAAAAH!

I MET THA GUYS FROM THE CORPSE TODAY! FAKIN' METAL!!!

\m/

Tour!!!

The tour bus's picking us up in a matter of minutes! MAYHEM HERE WE COME!!
I've never been this excited my whole life! I'm feeling like a little child!

Tour

So the tour's coming up. We, the band, can't seriously wait any longer! We want to ROCK! And we want to rock now!

Summer, metal, tours ... Paradise in Hell :)

Who is that strange man in the shadows?

Hello, dear fellars of the dark

The strange man in the shadows name is Tahvo, nice to meet you :d

Im 25 years old and I am the dreaded lead singer of the gothic rock group Imperium_090.

I met the boys from the Circle at the gigs some years ago, and it seems that our friendship has lived on :d

Am I supposed to tell something about myself now? Am I a nice person? Well, I, myself, think Im a pretty friendly being of the night? Others may not think so.. But generally I think a lot about being nice to persons I meet even though I dont know them at first, and I always offer my seat for elderly people in the bus.

My appearance? Im quite tall, has long, dark (curly) hair, grey eyes and so on.. I always wear black (or a least dark) clothes and Ive always had a predilection for long coats or cloaks.

What am I good at? Mm, I guess Im fairly good at singing since Im the lead singer in a band. Theres a lot of other thinks Im good at and love doing but the list is simply too long to write here. If you want to do something bad enough, you can do it! Thats what I believe and its really important for me to make others believe it too because so many people dont think they can do what they really want to do. They can.

The family of mine? I have a mother, a father and a twin sister called Tarja. Tarjas a really big part of my world since were twins and share so much - not only the room or the toys when we were kids but also our DNA, and that matters a lot to me. I think shes the feminine part of me, and Im the masculine part of her, and therefore shes 'me' in so many kind of ways. I really couldnt imagine how my life would be without her.


That was all I could remember right now,

Ill now bid you farewell,

Use the nights with great care, you have to be home at dawn or the suns deadly rays will tear your pretty body apart,

Tahvo

Promises

We're all sorry that we haven't written in here for a long time now. The reason is that we've been practising like Hell this past week, and we're almost ready for the tour ;)

Right now we're actually sitting in my parents garage - we're taking a break! We've been busy all day with one of our songs that just sounds - wrong :S

We'll try to write more in here, but we promise you that we'll have a lot of time after the tour! ;D